Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

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KimDonesia
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:43 pm

Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by KimDonesia »

I would like to mention, before I go into my story, that I was very disappointed when searching for ex-Muslim testimonials on the internet while I was thinking about leaving Islam. I was looking for stories that I could relate to in order to know that I wasn't alone. However, a lot of the ex-Muslims were Western women who had married a Muslim man and didn't have a very pretty relationship.

This makes me cringe, because first of all it seems that each of these women converted for a man and left because of a man, and it didn't help me in my journey apostatizing from Islam. These women didn't exactly directly criticize Islam or provide answers. They, instead, based their views on Islam on the man they were married too which didn't help me at all. I prefer direct criticism of Islam and its actual teachings based on the Qur'an and sunnah.

Anyway, so first of all, I guess I'd better start with the formalities. I'm from Queensland, Australia. I don't tell people my exact whereabouts in big old Queensland for safety reasons - you know, death penalty for apostasy from Islam and all of that lovely stuff. I am a young woman of 18-years-old. Yeah, I know... Young... But don't judge me based on age!

In a nutshell, I converted to Islam after being attracted to it while living in Indonesia with my step-father for a while. I was Muslim for almost 2 years (since I was 16-years-old) and within that time, I acquired a great deal of Islamic knowledge and had extremely high iman (faith). I agreed with everything in the Qur'an, I prayed 5 times a day (fard, sunnah & nafl), I fasted from sunrise to sunset during Ramadan and also non-obligatory fasts 2 days a week.

I wore a hijab (headscarf), and was very strict with my clothing... Nothing I wore was allowed to show any curve on my body whatsoever. I was strongly "connected" to Allah - so much that I would talk to him every night before I went to sleep. Every good deed I did was for Allah, and everything else I did was with fear of Allah's punishment if I did something wrong.

Early in my 2 years as a Muslim, I started doing my own form of "dawah" (propagating Islam) on Youtube. I became quite well-known on there as "KimDonesia", and I even went on the radio in Turkey, went on TV in the Middle East during Ramadan and did interviews for Islamic magazines. I constantly received praise, and nobody ever came to me with doubts of whether I was a Muslim or not.

I'd like to add that when I publicly left Islam, the Muslims turned to their most common logical fallacy in justifying my apostasy - "No True Scotsman" fallacy (e.g. "You were never a real Muslim, so that's why you left Islam. No true Muslim could ever leave."). It's funny that these claims were never made when I was a Muslim.

On my 18th birthday, my beloved canine family member and companion passed away. Beauty was a dog that my family had in our lives for 14 years, so her death struck us all. We were devastated, though convinced ourselves that she was no longer in pain - she had liver cancer and had to be euthanized - and that she had gone to a "better place". The death of my dog sent me into a depression which lasted for more than a week.

Contrary to the popular belief of Muslims mocking me and degrading the value of my dog's life by saying I left Islam for a mere "ugly, dirty mutt that was haram for me to keep anyway", it wasn't the death of Beauty that caused me to leave Islam. I do admit that she was the contributor to my constant thinking about death - the cognitive process that led me away from Islam. I wish I could thank her.

She caused me to realize that we will all die someday, which resulted in my fear for my non-Muslim family. You see, the Qur'an teaches that all of the non-believers who were exposed to Islam at some point in their worldly life - yet still reject it - will go to Hell for eternity and will be shown no mercy. I was terrified for my family and tried to think of ways to bring them to Islam.

My depression was cured when I confessed my fears to my mother. Mum knew that what I was depressed about had something to do with my choices about religion, however she waited for me to come to her rather than make assumptions. I cried to her and admitted out loud, for the first time, that my perception of God was different than the angry, sadistic dictator in the Qur'an. You could say I believed in the Deist god. No matter how much Muslims try to sugar-coat Allah's personality (or Muhammad's alter ego?) as shown in the Qur'an, I started to see right through it.

I explained to Mum that it is simply not logical that an omniscient God would create the human race just so that the majority of them would be sentenced to infinite punishment for finite actions. Mind you, the main action to grant one Hell would be to not believe in God. I decided with my mother that I wanted to leave Islam, however I still wanted to believe in God - I simply wanted to detach myself from organized religion.

However, I later realized that I was just following Pascal's Wager, meaning I was believing in God just in case there really was one and belief in God was the only thing that could get me a place in Heaven (if there was one). I realized that the existence of a God is illogical and in reality, cannot be proven. The day that God comes to me and shows me that he exists, I will believe in him. Or I might believe I had gone insane and had started hallucinating. For now, as there is simply no evidence that a God exists, I will continue to not believe in God.

I have been reading The God Delusion and might I say, Richard Dawkins is a complete genius. With this book, any lingering desire in my mind to believe in a God has been completely pushed out. I now understand that belief in God is a delusion, and we as human beings can live a more fulfilling life without religion or God for that matter. We do not need to delude ourselves just because we need "something" to "be there" and we are too cowardly to face that this is the only life we'll live, and we need to be free from religious indoctrination. We need to make the most of the only life we'll get, rather than spend it worshiping and fearing a supernatural being that probably doesn't even exist.

I do admit that I am rather proud of myself as it took a lot of strength to leave Islam and lose my beliefs in an imaginary sky daddy. I based my entire life around Islam and when I apostatized, I no longer knew how to live without religion. It took time, but I'm fine and completely happy now. I am back on track - back to how I used to be before Islam. Furthermore, I am proud of my bravery to "come out" in public on Youtube as a new non-Muslim. I was surprised at how many ex-Muslims were approaching me, as well as Muslims thinking about leaving Islam and just needing that little push from somebody they could relate to.

If you search for "KimDonesia" on Youtube, you will find my channel. Bear in mind that I use that channel now to express my distaste for religion, so my videos will most likely offend the apostates who went to other Abrahamic religions.

Since I have left Islam publicly, most of the online Muslim community has been brutal. I have received a few death threats and wishes of AIDs upon me, ad hominem attacks left right and centre, assumptions that are logically fallacious, and ridicule for my decision to leave Islam.

I do admit it has been difficult and it may get worse as I'm not going to stop speaking out about my views about Islam. However, I take comfort in the fact it's only because their minds have been enslaved and completely closed, and their beliefs are laughable therefore nothing they say really matters.

yeezevee
Posts: 6547
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 9:17 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by yeezevee »

That is a terrific and wonderful confession dear KimDonesia ...Nonmuslim-Mulsim-Nonmuslim.. Not a big deal one can go in and out of Islam but that you can do in Islam only at certain places And you must realize once you are a Muslim by becoming non-muslim you will be a target here in this life and after this life unless confess it to Allah in presence of a Mullah and get back to Islam. More over you must realize however good person s/he is, after leaving Islam if you question Islam/Muhammad/Quran The real Muslim .. the Muhammad followers have the right to take away your life. And that is told by Allah God in that LOST BOOK of Allah

So please think about and act accordingly. But as long as you are physically safe place in this life and far from Muslim Baboons and some times Muslim robots for e.g Most places in west(NOT ALL PLACES)., you are O.K.. you are safe.

So welcome to FFI and watch these videos.. these are For and against to that wonderful Out-in-out KimDonesia..


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlBveY8wPy8" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bw_fN7jjmxQ" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8iRQ93O3iM" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KcgVhqOnceY" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Damn I never looked in to the characters like above.. You GUYS SHOULD REPLACE ALL THESE RASCALS with beards .. the imams .. the Mullahs.. the fools in Islam.. You girls are funny, crazy and nuts on those videos...lol Damn what a 10 year of internet could do is wipe of 1000 years silly billy bums and their books..

with best wishes and have happy holidays and please take it easy.. DO NOT ANNOUNCE WAR AGAINST ISLAM .. lol..

yeezevee
Last edited by yeezevee on Sat Dec 26, 2009 4:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
charleslemartel
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Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 2:01 pm
Location: Throne Of Allah

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by charleslemartel »

Welcome to FFI, Kimdonesia.

You are a brave girl, hats off to you.

Btw, How did you come to know about FFI?
Islam is a funny religion which is misunderstood by its scholars and correctly understood by ordinary Muslims.
Faith is keeping your eyes shut when looking at the world, and/or keeping your eyes open only for the beauty of the world.

User avatar
Ariel
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Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 1:34 am
Location: The Netherlands

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by Ariel »

Welcome to FFI Kim, and thank you for your story.
You are a very brave girl, but please take care.

Regards.
Ariel.
The heart of the wise inclines to the right,
but the heart of the fool to the left.

User avatar
expozIslam
Posts: 3114
Joined: Sun Feb 01, 2009 10:32 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by expozIslam »

Welcome to FFI Kim,
I am not sure if you looked at wikisilam or ffi for testimonies of muslimahs born in islam but ditching it well before thier 20th birthday. There are quite a few on this forum but we advise all teenagers to spend more time on their education and financial freedom before spending more time on this or similar site.
Can you please leave your testimony at wikiislam as well.

I hope you continue to write and speak against Islam now that you have realized what a death cult it is.
I wish you best. :rock:

There will be times when you are under lot of stress, please feel free to rant here if you have to and please take an anonymous name. You can freely voice your opinion on this site.
“The truth, of course, is that a billion falsehoods told a billion times by a billion people are still false.”

KimDonesia
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:43 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by KimDonesia »

charleslemartel wrote:Welcome to FFI, Kimdonesia.

You are a brave girl, hats off to you.

Btw, How did you come to know about FFI?
Thank you for your warm welcome and compliment! :*)

I came to know about Faith Freedom from a Google search for apostates from Islam/ex-Muslims.

KimDonesia
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:43 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by KimDonesia »

Ariel wrote:Welcome to FFI Kim, and thank you for your story.
You are a very brave girl, but please take care.

Regards.
Ariel.
You're very welcome. Of course I'll take care. ;) I am aware of how dangerous some Muslims can get one one leaves their religion or chooses to speak out against Islam. So I'm taking extra care not to let my whereabouts leak out. I'm moving soon anyway to a big city where people won't be able to find me.

I'm not going to be telling any Muslim friends (in real life) where I live, too. So all should be well. I'll also be living away from my family so they should be safe too.

KimDonesia
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:43 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by KimDonesia »

expozIslam wrote:Welcome to FFI Kim,
I am not sure if you looked at wikisilam or ffi for testimonies of muslimahs born in islam but ditching it well before thier 20th birthday. There are quite a few on this forum but we advise all teenagers to spend more time on their education and financial freedom before spending more time on this or similar site.
Can you please leave your testimony at wikiislam as well.

I hope you continue to write and speak against Islam now that you have realized what a death cult it is.
I wish you best. :rock:

There will be times when you are under lot of stress, please feel free to rant here if you have to and please take an anonymous name. You can freely voice your opinion on this site.
It's fine, I won't get addicted... I'm already addicted to Youtube, haha. Debating with my newfound knowledge is exciting! But I usually just join forums to linger, see what's going on every now and then. I usually can't really keep up with forum posts sometimes, though. So don't worry.

Anyway, of course I'll continue to write/speak against Islam! I've been on the inside and gained knowledge, and now I'm on the outside and gaining knowledge. It's good - in a way - to have/have had that experience.

yeezevee
Posts: 6547
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 9:17 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by yeezevee »

Anyway, of course I'll continue to write/speak against Islam! I've been on the inside and gained knowledge, and now I'm on the outside and gaining knowledge.
what?? what did you say dear KimDonesia?? You gained KNOWLEDGE from Inside Islam?? what KNOWLEDGE are we talking dear Kimberly??


And that too you joined in Islam when you were 16 year old and by 18 you turn around?? And You have knowledge of Islam?? Well it is possible dear Kimberly. Aisha was a SCHOLAR AND PREACHING ISLAM by the time Prophet Muhammad(PBUH) died. And she was ~ same age as yours..
In a nutshell, I converted to Islam after being attracted to it while living in Indonesia with my step-father for a while. I was Muslim for almost 2 years (since I was 16-years-old) and within that time, I acquired a great deal of Islamic knowledge and had extremely high iman (faith).
I see.. Now I got you., So what happened to your step father., is he all right..

Please go slow against Islam..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AhkgDp-kNYc" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eF1Sbwd-Va0" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZkFefwmtts" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znXnuJ3bBcE" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBd_Hien1Jk" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

You are all hyper ... lol.. So did you ever read Quran dear Kimberly?? And I am very very happy for you as you are one of the luckiest person ..didn't end up like these girls.,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aNxFDbVe38" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfgMub2PTn0n" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

with best wishes
yeezevee
Last edited by yeezevee on Sat Dec 26, 2009 4:57 pm, edited 5 times in total.

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charleslemartel
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Location: Throne Of Allah

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by charleslemartel »

KimDonesia wrote:
charleslemartel wrote:Welcome to FFI, Kimdonesia.

You are a brave girl, hats off to you.

Btw, How did you come to know about FFI?
Thank you for your warm welcome and compliment! :*)

I came to know about Faith Freedom from a Google search for apostates from Islam/ex-Muslims.
Your way of turning an apostate publicly is remarkable. Not only because it demonstrates your courage to the world, but also because it would give courage to many Muslims who are closet apostates to come out in the open. So far, Islam has been like a one way street or a penitentiary where the convicts on a death row are kept; you can enter, but can't exit. This fear of being killed forces many ex-Muslims to live a life of duplicity. Even though by coming out in the open has put you in danger, if more people come out like you, it would start an avalanche which has been kept in check throughout the history on the pain of death.
Islam is a funny religion which is misunderstood by its scholars and correctly understood by ordinary Muslims.
Faith is keeping your eyes shut when looking at the world, and/or keeping your eyes open only for the beauty of the world.

Gabriel
Posts: 161
Joined: Fri May 01, 2009 1:17 am

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by Gabriel »

Hi Kim and Welcome! Thanks for your testimony. :)

BTW Hows Pink Bunny doing? :D

KimDonesia
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:43 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by KimDonesia »

yeezevee wrote:
Anyway, of course I'll continue to write/speak against Islam! I've been on the inside and gained knowledge, and now I'm on the outside and gaining knowledge.
what?? what did you say dear KimDonesia?? You gained KNOWLEDGE from Inside Islam?? what KNOWLEDGE are we talking dear Kimberly??


And that too you joined in Islam when you were 16 year old and by 18 you turn around?? And You have knowledge of Islam?? Well it is possible dear Kimberly. Aisha was a SCHOLAR AND PREACHING ISLAM by the time Prophet Muhammad(PBUH) died. And she was ~ same age as yours..
In a nutshell, I converted to Islam after being attracted to it while living in Indonesia with my step-father for a while. I was Muslim for almost 2 years (since I was 16-years-old) and within that time, I acquired a great deal of Islamic knowledge and had extremely high iman (faith).
I see.. Now I got you., So what happened to your step father., is he all right..

Please go slow against Islam..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AhkgDp-kNYc" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eF1Sbwd-Va0" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZkFefwmtts" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znXnuJ3bBcE" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBd_Hien1Jk" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

You are all hyper ... lol.. So did you ever read Quran dear Kimberly?? And I am very very happy for you as you are one of the luckiest person ..didn't end up like these girls.,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aNxFDbVe38" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfgMub2PTn0n" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

with best wishes
yeezevee
You be trollin'!

yeezevee
Posts: 6547
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 9:17 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by yeezevee »

You be trollin'!
i know .. i know dear.. please take care.. http://www.wikiislam.com/wiki/KimDonesi ... _Muslim%29" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

with best wishes
yeezevee
Last edited by yeezevee on Sun Dec 27, 2009 11:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

KimDonesia
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:43 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by KimDonesia »

charleslemartel wrote:
KimDonesia wrote:
charleslemartel wrote:Welcome to FFI, Kimdonesia.

You are a brave girl, hats off to you.

Btw, How did you come to know about FFI?
Thank you for your warm welcome and compliment! :*)

I came to know about Faith Freedom from a Google search for apostates from Islam/ex-Muslims.
Your way of turning an apostate publicly is remarkable. Not only because it demonstrates your courage to the world, but also because it would give courage to many Muslims who are closet apostates to come out in the open. So far, Islam has been like a one way street or a penitentiary where the convicts on a death row are kept; you can enter, but can't exit. This fear of being killed forces many ex-Muslims to live a life of duplicity. Even though by coming out in the open has put you in danger, if more people come out like you, it would start an avalanche which has been kept in check throughout the history on the pain of death.
Thank you. I feel that my public apostasy has shown a lot of Muslims that it's OK to leave Islam, and that it's completely normal. Part of the aim of my channel now is to show Muslims that it's OK and they don't have to hold onto something if it doesn't make sense to them. I've helped to deconvert a lot of Muslims in the past month or so, and hopefully many more to come! It's great. :*)

KimDonesia
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:43 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by KimDonesia »

Gabriel wrote:Hi Kim and Welcome! Thanks for your testimony. :)

BTW Hows Pink Bunny doing? :D
Thank you! :)

Pink bunny is a bit sad at the moment - he's squished between my bed and the wall! :whistling:

User avatar
enceladus
Posts: 2069
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 11:00 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by enceladus »

KimDonesia wrote:
(snip)
I do admit it has been difficult and it may get worse as I'm not going to stop speaking out about my views about Islam. However, I take comfort in the fact it's only because their minds have been enslaved and completely closed, and their beliefs are laughable therefore nothing they say really matters.

Very true, KimDonesia! Welcome!

Yes, the sheer waste of human potential that Islam snuffs out in its followers is very sad. It utterly suffocates their minds with the nonsense in the Quran and hadiths.

The utter lie that is Islam is best exemplified by the Taliban. They are **desperate** to stop the people in their area of influence from becoming educated ( and "educated" does not mean going to a madrassa - they **indoctrinate.** Big difference. ) They **love** the "mushroom principle" - "keep the people in the dark, and feed them on B.S". (Islam).

Interesting, ay. Fancy that - that the so-called "all-powerful-Allah's religion" can't take a bit of competition from *human* Western education! What a pathetically weak """religion""".

( I'd like to insult Islam even more - Mohammad and his make-believe Allah - p!$$ be upon them both - but that'll do for now.... )

Anyway, the Taliban burn down schools (especially girls' schools), and just cannot stand the idea of the population getting an education. If the people do that, the Taliban know that then the "game is up". People will be able to see through the nonsense and lies, and see Islam for what it really is - the biggest con-job in the history of the world.
- enceladus

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Cassie
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Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by Cassie »

Well done, girl. Keep it up. Be strong knowing that a god, if She exists, would not have chosen such a low-life like Mo the bandit pedophile as a prophet. Muslims are stifled and kept in fear. Their minds are shackled by an imaginary allah created by a delusional bandit who spoke to a cave pixie (LOL!). There is no allah, only Muhammad the polygamist pedophile who enslaved women and *gasp!* children!

Welcome to the land of the free!


xxx
Cassie

yeezevee
Posts: 6547
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 9:17 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by yeezevee »

Cassie throws Bombs in her posts... lol..
Be strong knowing that a god, if She exists......
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vcTcF5VC_s" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0oR5GwAEYCE" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

indeed that is the way to go and educate fools..

with best wishes
yeezevee

khaled12313
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun Dec 27, 2009 1:50 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by khaled12313 »

iam arab egyptian want to leav islam.. iam 24...married and welling to change my life ... what should i do ... is it realy i have to accept beeing a muslim ?
i need help

Mail address deleted by M for security reasons.

yeezevee
Posts: 6547
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 9:17 pm

Re: Well-known female Muslim Youtuber leaves Islam!

Post by yeezevee »

khaled12313 joins
iam arab egyptian want to leav islam.. iam 24...married and welling to change my life ... what should i do ... is it realy i have to accept beeing a muslim ?


i need help
welcome to FFI dear khaled12313.,
is it realy i have to accept beeing a muslim ?
I didn't get that wording., Is some NOT accepting you as Muslim?? Who and why?? did I get that right? what is the big deal being Muslim or Non Muslim? Not much difference as far as human beings are concerned..

So many Khalids in FFI , and I too know many., It is interesting to note Khalid is such a Muslim name ., You go to the center of a Muslim town and shout "Khalid" at least 10 people will look at you..lol

with best wishes
yeezevee

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