17 year old apostate.

[BetterDaysAhead]

Hey there fellow ex-muslims,

This is my story. I was born a muslim to extremely strict arab/african parents in Britain and raised in a terrible environment - Islam was beaten and bullied into us, indoctrined and ingrained from the word go. I even saw my mother beaten and humiliated in front of me. I know not all muslim parents are like this but I have to say most that I have seen are. I hate talking about it in detail because the memories are painful. Except my parents had a bad seed - me. From the age of around eight I began questioning Islam freely. They saw a monster rear its head in me and believed they had to crush it. But my spirit wouldn't let them. I kept it in me and followed Islam, stomaching the abuse. I secretly took off my hijab. When my father found out he beat me with a stick until my thighs had swollen so much I couldn't walk normally.

I left Islam because it was not in my 'fitrah' to be a muslim. I questioned it as a child and never got the answers I wanted. I remember asking my dad as a child if Allah was like our 'father' and getting shouted at that Allah was far above being my father - how dare I and who did I think I was? I felt sad, all I wanted was a father figure to watch over me. I couldn't identify with this God. The quran scared me and I was terrified to die, convinced I was a sinner. I didn't sleep at night because I knew that when we slept God took our souls and he picked wether or not to give them back. What if he was in the mood to keep mine? I remember not being allowed to watch 'Cinderella' because of the illicit love story it had but we were allowed to see dead, dismembered bodies on AlJazeera.

It was all so confusing and contradictory. All I can say is that I'm glad I left. I'm free now and I can sleep my nights without worrying about demons or hell or a wrathful tyrant God. My only problem is that seven months ago my parents sent me back to their home country for a healthy amount of brainwashing and now here I am, forced to pretend I'm a muslim. I have one uncle who is an apostate like me and he is in his sixties but hes still afraid to talk about it in front of people. We face death if found out. I am doing all within my power to get back home, including contacting the embassy. If it wasn't for Islam I would've had and been raised in a loving family but now all I can hope to do is to change my younger brother and sister's way of thinking and free them too.

Cheers,

A young apostate.

[Marie]

Welcome and good luck.

[tejpat]

[enceladus]

Welcome, BDA! Good on you for leaving Islam!

Whenever I read about someone who has left Islam, I get the same happy feeling as I did when the Berlin Wall fell - seeing those people celebrating their freedom.

You have done really well to see (at such a young age) that Islam is a fraud and a pack of lies.
I look forward to seeing more of your posts here. Bye for now -
- enceladus

[BetterDaysAhead]

Thank you for the warm welcome everyone. I'm happy to (hopefully) be living the rest of my life as a free woman and contributing (positively) towards the advance of humanity. I am not really free now because of where I am but it really helps not living with a sense of impending doom and thinking my life is in the hands of a sadistic God. Like I said my only wish is to help my brother and sister (15 and 13) but I don't know how to go about it. I honestly believe Islam is toxic and impacts negatively on its followers' mental health, be it in a minor or major way.

[sword_of_truth]

Congratulations on leaving the cult.

Sometimes, I am lulled into complacency because there are a lot of nice people who happen to be muslim and almost start to feel friendly towards Islam. But that doesn't change what's written in the Quran and Hadith. It's sick. Really sick. It can't be overlooked. It can't be forgiven. There is no excuse for being a muslim and lying to yourself to convince yourself that the sick Quran and sick Hadith are somehow okay, despite their blatant disregard for human rights.

Your story reminds me of the mental slavery that I went through for many years, pretending to belief in those monstrosities. Now, I'm still haunted by it when I come across muslims. Half my family is muslim, so it's easy to forget sometimes how wrong and outrageous Islam is. They are who they are, but the Quran still says beat women, cut hands, crucify people who wage war against Allah and his prophet, calls non-believers the worst creatures. And they are okay with that. Then, I'm not allowed to criticize them one bit or they get hysterical. The hypocrisy is astounding. Even if their excuses were valid for the Quran's contempt of non-believers, they can't see that they would get ridiculously upset if someone said the same things about Muslims as it says about non-believers in the Quran.

[Sten]

Hi BDA,

You seem like an extremely emotionally resilient and strong person. I have great respect for you. Never give up on your own free will and independance, but also stay safe. Don't do anything that compromises your safety. Above all trust no-one until you are back home.

[antineoETC]

This is my story. I was born a muslim to extremely strict arab/african parents in Britain and raised in a terrible environment - Islam was beaten and bullied into us, indoctrined and ingrained from the word go. I even saw my mother beaten and humiliated in front of me. I know not all muslim parents are like this but I have to say most that I have seen are.

So whose "on-the-ground experience" do we believe? People like this one or the good folk over at CEMB who "Know Muslims" and interpret any suggestion that there are longstanding, endemic and widespread "Islamist" tendencies within western Islamic populations that cannot be explained away by recent "radicalization" by Saudi preachers as indicating a racist lust to ethically cleanse their nearest and dearest still-Muslim (and without exception "moderate") friends and family????

[ringmaster]

So whose "on-the-ground experience" do we believe? People like this one or the good folk over at CEMB who "Know Muslims" and interpret any suggestion that there are longstanding, endemic and widespread "Islamist" tendencies within western Islamic populations that cannot be explained away by recent "radicalization" by Saudi preachers as indicating a racist lust to ethically cleanse their nearest and dearest still-Muslim (and without exception "moderate") friends and family????

We just need to go by what the koran (unabrogated latter Medina verses) and sahih hadith say.

[SomInfidel]

Holy sh!t! LOL, our situations are so similar !

[Nazzim ibn Abu Talib]

Holy sh!t! LOL, our situations are so similar !

The path to enlightenment and true knowledge all have same phases, doubt, questioning and analysis.

[Ghaith]

Holy sh!t! LOL, our situations are so similar !

The path to enlightenment and true knowledge all have same phases, doubt, questioning and analysis.

[enceladus]

If you're still around, BDA - ignore Ghaith. He is still in the cult.
Still convinced that despite being almost 1400 years behind us in development terms, he thinks he knows better.

He is like the "emperor with no clothes" - strutting around trying to convince us of his "finery", when everyone else can see that there is nothing there.
- enceladus